In Loving Memory

On Friday evening I received a phone call from a friend in Phoenix to tell me that the husband of a mutual friend had been killed in a tragic bicycle accident. For the past two days, I have been stunned and reeling. He leaves behind my friend, their two married daughters and what he always jokingly referred to as his "second family"--a 9 year-old and 7 year-old.

I haven't been able to sleep the past two nights, and so in a selfish attempt for closure, I have decided to post some of my thoughts. I hope to do so both humbly and respectfully.

First of all, if there is anyone in this world I would aspire to grow up to be, it is Jana. Her strengths are in every area where I long to be strong but fall short. She is soft-spoken and patient. She never draws any attention to herself, but fills needs quietly, does the lion's share of work in every setting, is careful and observant in every word and action. She is always the one to say the right thing, to make the needed phone call, to quietly lift the soul in distress. She is the most genuine person I know. I didn't know Gerry as well, but have always liked him as a cheerful and loving father. He had a dry and smart sense of humor, an astounding gospel intellect, a cool head and a generous hand. He was someone who deserved a wife like Jana.

In moments like these, I find myself reevaluating my own life--how I spend my time, how I treat my family, where my faith lies. My heart aches for my friend and her family. My faith as a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints teaches me that "families can be together forever." I don't doubt that my friend will one day be reunited with her husband...this is a source of both hope and comfort. In the meantime, however, there is a lot of loneliness and sadness in the separation. I know that there are some trials that can only be faced with time and the comforting presence of the Holy Ghost. I believe that the gift of the Atonement of Jesus Christ has power not only to redeem us from our sins, but to ease the pain of our trials and burdens.

As I sat in my church Christmas program yesterday, the words of one Christmas carol took on new meaning. "Be near me, Lord Jesus, I ask thee to stay close by me forever, and love me, I pray." I pray that my friend and her family will feel the Savior closer by them this Christmas. I am grateful in a world where life is fragile, that I--and my friend--have a foundation that is sure.